A Question of Perspective

It’s kind of shitty out today… after a slew of beautiful, warm days… which were right on the heels of a snowstorm.

From what I understand via the Internet, it’s sunny and lovely back in Rhody.  Facebook is thick with comments about BBQs, frolicking in the sun, and other spring weekend excitement from back east.

Here in Littleton, I’m inside, where I’ve been for days upon days with yucky sickness… which has now morphed into something all-together lovelier than what’s been going on this week.

My stomach is grumbling so loudly I swear the people next door must be able to hear it. Every time it makes a noise, George looks up… that’s how loud it is.

Go eat something, you might be thinking… no, no, no, faithful reader, it’s not hunger causing the rumble… in fact I’ve no idea what’s wrong with me. I feel fine, other than the fact that I’ve been in the bathroom for the better part of the afternoon. Sorry, I know, TMI.  But seriously, get over it… you’ve read about my boobs, and all other sorts of things here, and I gave fair warning to those of you who fancy themselves fragile.  Toughen up, people!

As of just about now, I’ve been in CO for just about 2 months. Let’s have a time line of that time, shall we?

• February 14 (Happy Valentines Day to us!): Megan and I get into the way over-packed car and GO WEST! (It’s OK, you can sing along, I am…)
• February 16: Arrive in CO after driving like crazy people and really not stopping at all, except for a couple of interesting moments in Iowa, and Nebraska. We’re not in CO for long.
• February 19: We take to the skies and head to Arizona to visit with Megan’s parents, get George, who’s been vacationing there whilst Megan and I drove all over creation, and… I get to play golf for the first time ever… I completely suck at it.
• February 23: We arrive back in CO, driving this time from AZ with George in the back, and stay put for a while. I promptly get sick. Head cold, exhausted, tons of snot and as Megan calls it, to my duress, mucus. *Shudder*
• February 25: I start work here in CO, from my fancy new home office that Megan painted the color of my choice and Justin outfitted with shiny new monitors. I get a stomach “thing.”  That’s all you need to know about that.
• March: Everything is just lovely. I am happier than I’ve ever been… I feel good, I’m eating well, the idea of a cigarette makes me want to puke… all systems go!
• Mid-March: I say to myself: Self, it’s time to get in shape! Let’s take up running! Seriously? Yes, go! It was a little bit of a nightmare at first, but I’m trundling along…
• April 6-10: I head to RI for some in-person meetings and the like.  Running in RI sucks. I mean, the one time I tried it, it did…
• Mid-April: I’m in full gear, going to the gym often, eating well, feeling good. Megan gets a cold. A bad one.
• Late April: I get Megan’s cold. Her cold has turned, after 2 weeks, into a disgusting, green funk, sinus infection. It’s so bad she actually nettys (and calls the doctor). She says things to me like, it doesn’t fit in my nostril… I, on the other hand, have trouble creating a good seal around the spout (thus preventing the saline from coming out of the nostril it’s entering) because, as an old friend once said, I’ve got nostrils you could drive a Cadillac through. There’s no running, there’s no going to the gym, there’s very little even leaving the house.
• And here we are… today. My cold seems to have dissipated.  My head is still a little fuzzy from the fluid in my sinuses, which is no big deal… and I was all set to go to a friend’s birthday party tonight until the stomach grumbling started.  This blog post alone has taken an hour, because I have to keep getting up to spend time on the pot.  I know, you so wanted to know that.

My friends back on the east coast point out my recurring sinus and stomach issues as a sign from somewhere that I’m destined to return to Rhody.  That it’s Colorado’s water, air, whatever… making me sick. I know they jest.  But seriously…  WTF, sickness! I’m tired of it!